You read, you watch, you listen and at the end of the day… you can’t take any decision. You feel stuck.

It’s very common and many of us have this issue but don’t talk about it. We often keep it for ourselves. Sharing it would would be like exposing a weakness, especially for men.

“Showing that i don’t know what to do?”

… “I can’t do that”

How do you deal with that?

How do you regain your ability to take decisions?

How do you get out of this “stuck” or “i don’t know what to do” position

Tune down the noise. Shut it down.

The noise is one key factor in your inability to take decision. Ever been to a party or a night club and after a few hours you feel like taking a break from the loud music? Same logic. Without realizing it, the pattern here is that you disconnect to reconnect. You need to tune down or shut down the noise. To do this you often move away from this noise.

In your context, the noise maybe your social media apps, family members, TV at home. How many folks i have talked to who told me they already felt much better after a social media detox or after a weekend without their mobile phone.

In fact, you haven’t lost your ability to take decision. It’s actually here but it has little space for itself so what you will do is to give it some space back. You are going to remove the space for the noise. For instance, read the page about getting out of the rabbit hole to identify specific actions you can do to starve this activity.

Disconnect to reconnect

To bring back on the stage your ability to take decision, you will have to reconnect with yourself. To reconnect with yourself you will have to disconnect from some stuff around you. It’s all pure common sense but if no one reminds you of it you will likely not think about it. I am just helping you to put on the paper what you already know.

Find time for yourself. Take yourself away from the noise. Be it your family, a city, your flat, your work. It is critical that you disconnect to be able to reconnect.

To reconnect, identify physical spaces and period that you love, that you feel comfortable with. It’s often here that you will best reconnect with yourself. It can be on a plane during a long haul flight or it can be a shed in your backyard. It’s your space. It’s where you reconnect with yourself, your ideas and what really matters to you.

Break your routine

It’s often your current routine that contains activities that prevent you to move forward. My advice is to break your routine. Pick a day and on that day you will not do what you usually do. Do whatever you want. The key point is to break your routine. Meaning you are going to put your body, including your brain, in a new context and this will have an impact on you. Sometimes your routine is so powerful (it could be an addiction to something) that you will need to prevent yourself from reverting to your routine. Delete apps that you are addicted to. Get yourself a plane ticket and take 3 days out of town.

What really matter to you?

You rather do one thing well than doing a little bit of 5 things. It’s common sense yet i see countless folks trying to do A, B, C, X, Y, Z at the same time. It’s shocking when you are looking at what they do but if you were to put yourself in their shoes it would not shock you. They do not realize that they actually get nothing or barely anything done.

More isn’t better. It’s the opposite in our situation.

Look at what you are doing, today, this week, this month. What is your priority? What really matters to you and your tribe (family, team, group)? Don’t tell me everything matters or i will say “BULLSHIT”. Identify 1 or 2 things that really matter. Now, once you have identified these 1 or 2 things, think of them in terms of outcome you are after and not in terms of task to do. I agree with you that you want to do these 1 or 2 things but what is the outcome you are really after? Can you express it in a clear manner?

The key reason i want you to start thinking in terms of outcome and not in terms of task is that you are targeting outcomes. The task or activity you do are simply tools to get you there. You will quickly realize that there are more than one path to get to the outcome you want to reach.

There are folks who will tell me, “i don’t know what really matter to me” or “i don’t know anymore”. Well, disconnect to reconnect. Ask yourself, what do you keep coming back to? What intrinsically motivate you? What drives you? These questions help you to reconnect to your core, who you are. It may also help you to realize how much you have deviated from who you really are.